How To Best Manage Finances in Dementia:
Resources For Caregivers
Are you a dementia caregiver struggling to balance finances while providing care for your loved one?
We welcome Justin Chastain, a financial planner from Parallel Financial (https://www.parallelfinancial.com), to discuss the essential steps caregivers can take to manage their finances and secure their future.
Justin began his financial career in 2010 after earning a Business Management degree from Furman University.
He has worked in private banking and holds designations as a CERTIFIED FINANCIAL PLANNER™, Chartered Financial Consultant®, and Certified Retirement Counselor®.
Justin specializes in helping business owners and families with comprehensive financial planning, focusing on making choices that align with their values.
An active member of the Financial Planning Association, he also teaches financial literacy in North and South Carolina.
In his free time, Justin enjoys golf, staying active, and exploring new places.
Why Financial Planning Matters for Caregivers
Many caregivers are thrown into their roles unexpectedly, often without having planned for the financial toll caregiving can take.
Justin shares his personal story of losing his mother, which inspired him to help others avoid the stress and anxiety that come from financial uncertainty.
In this episode, Justin emphasizes that it’s never too late to start planning, whether you’re already a caregiver or preparing for the possibility.
With proper financial planning, caregivers can ensure they’re prepared for the costs of long-term care, medical bills, and unexpected expenses that come with dementia caregiving.
Key Takeaways for Caregivers
Understand Your Cash Flow: Knowing where your money goes each month is the first step to creating a solid financial plan.
Justin advises caregivers to evaluate their spending and ensure they are budgeting effectively for both current and future expenses.
Have a Will and Healthcare Directive: These legal documents ensure your loved one’s wishes are honored and protect you from making tough decisions during emotional times.
Justin stresses the importance of getting these documents in place sooner rather than later.
Use Financial Advisors Who Work for You: Justin recommends working with fiduciary planners who prioritize your needs, not their commissions.
Asking the right questions—like how they get paid and who they work for—can help you find an advisor who truly has your best interests at heart.
Read More : 187. How To Prepare For Dementia Care: Resources For Caregivers
Planning Ahead
Justin also speaks to the sandwich generation—adults caring for both their parents and children—about the importance of having hard conversations early.
Whether it’s talking about money, long-term care options, or future healthcare needs, getting ahead of these issues will provide peace of mind and reduce stress down the line.
Transcript
[0:00] Well, welcome back to today’s episode. And I’m very excited because for multiple
Welcome to Financial Planning Month
[0:07] reasons, but one of the reasons is October is financial planning month. And the previous episode that I had related to financial planning, people were really enjoying that. So I decided to bring a friend and a colleague by the name of Justin Chastain onto the podcast again today to talk about finances and caregiving because the two really do go hand in hand. And Justin is somebody I know personally and can vouch for his honesty and his integrity. So I thought it would be a great conversation to have Justin on today. So, Justin, why don’t you tell people a little bit about what it is that you do, how you got into financial planning, just introduce yourself to the people who are listening. Perfectly. And again, thank you so much for having me on, because, you know, the work that you’re doing truly is so tremendously valuable, not just to individuals, but families alike. And much like your story, and I’ve heard yours, the reason that I do what I do is nine years ago, we lost my mom. It was a medical malpractice issue that came up, and it affected me tremendously. My dad was an entrepreneur. My mom worked as an accountant for a company here locally in Greenville, South Carolina.
[1:25] And through, I think, hard times or what I would say silver lining moment, you really start to have conversations about what really matters in life. And through that process, I said, you know, as people are dealing with life moments, sick love, it could be getting married. It could be getting divorced. It doesn’t always have to be just negative. I said, isn’t it a shame that the number one thing that most people think about is money? Worthless green paper with presidents that have some outdated mullets on them. And we freak out, right? But really, money is just the tool. And it is important. I’m not going to sit here and say that it isn’t. But I said, you know, if people had plans, if they had somebody they could trust to build out holistic plans that carried them to, through, and beyond retirement, that would be beneficial. And you could do work that you got up and felt great about. And I worked many years chasing money, you know, the safety route we all look for, that W-2 job with benefits. And I said, this just isn’t cutting it for me. My health was deteriorating. My mom’s parents were still living. So my mom did not outlive her parents. And I said, you know what, there’s more to it. And I started building out my own book through Parallel Financial.
[2:39] And doing independent financial planning. And I absolutely love it. I mean, this is something that I would do. I honestly talk about probably more than I need to at times. I mean, even at parties, I’m sitting and talking about long-term care. I’m kidding with that. But that’s probably why I’m not invited to many parties because I love what I do. And I think there’s so much discrepancy in, you know, you hear in society, oh, I’ve got somebody that does my finances. Well, Well, it may only be an investment advisor. It could only be an insurance advisor. Financial planners are different. And you might not always need a true holistic financial plan at a certain point in your life, but you will get to definitely a threshold where it is drastically important. And we are different than just somebody that’s managing investments, which we can, but building out financial plans that are holistic around that person’s value and really just looking forward into issues like this with long-term care and caregiving is where we add the most tremendous value. So again, I got into it because of a situation that happened with a family member, and it really just sparked a moment in my mind, how can I help others? Avoid focusing on money, when in reality, money is just a tool that maximizes the things we really want.
Understanding Financial Planning vs. Investment Advice
[3:51] And that’s what I get up and get to do every single day. Oh, I love your passion.
[3:55] So when you mentioned a couple of things that I wanted to kind of touch on, explain to people listening, what is the difference then between financial planning per se and say, like you said, an investment advisor or an insurance advisor? How do you see the differences?
[4:12] What are some of the overlaps? Speak to people about that because if I don’t necessarily understand the difference, then I’m sure other people may struggle with the difference between true financial planning and a holistic view versus piecemealing things together. And that’s a great question. And I think not only do a lot of other people struggle with that. I think our industry in general needs to do a better job defining that. But if you think about it, investment advisory, so somebody could roll over a retirement benefit, somebody’s only look at you. Looking at your investment. And you know what? That might be the specific need that person needs. That doesn’t mean that they’re doing anything wrong. But as we get into retirement, when we start asking, okay, how much do I need to take out for required minimum distribution? How does this affect my overall tax strategy that I’m dealing with with my accountant or CPA?
[5:02] Am I saving enough? Because this is the number one biggest question for most retirees. Have I saved enough where I won’t run out of money during retirement? Just those three simple questions right there, we’re going to deal with on the planning side that an investment advisor is going to say, hey, I don’t know. We’ve just really helped you manage your assets. We’ve not really thought about it outside of the box like that. So same thing with insurance advisor. You may only need a life insurance policy or a long-term care policy, but do you know that you’re in the right one based on how you’re building out a financial plan, right? I mean, even with long-term care. We have people saying that they want a self-fund, which means they’re going to do it out of their own pocket. People that want long-term care or life insurance policies that have a rider attack.
[5:46] With that long-term care writer inside of it, which is best. That’s what a planner does. So the best way to really think about it is investment advisory, insurance advisory, that alone is not financial planning. That’s just somebody offering a product to maybe fill a need at that time and point. A financial planner is looking through cashflow, insurance, wealth accumulation and investment, estate planning. So really what a financial planner is doing is saying, hey, how can we help you do three things really well? Number one, not run out of money during retirement. Number two, maximize your tax efficiencies. And three, align your plan with your value that takes you to, through, and beyond retirement. And that’s where most people’s going to get the biggest benefit out because it’s like this. If you told me, hey, I’m going to give you a bunch of money, but we don’t have a target for it. I don’t know what you’re wanting to do in retirement in terms of travel or spending time with family or, hey, what do you think your healthcare situation?
[6:45] It’s hard to define that target. We don’t really know what we’re doing with our investment. So financial planning is really looking at the entire forest, not just a weed in that forest and making sure that overall forest is going to be healthy enough for you so that when you get into retirement.
[7:00] You know where to pull from, not just monetarily, but from insurance products and also family member support, maybe for life experiences.
[7:09] Right, and healthcare need situations.
[7:11] So a lot of people that are listening to this podcast are probably in one of
Supporting Spouses in Caregiving
[7:16] two groups, in two demographics. They’re either the spouses of somebody who already has dementia and may be, you know, in their late 50s, early 60s, or beyond, so closer to that retirement age, or they are the adult children or sometimes grandchildren of somebody living with dementia that has now been tumbled into a caregiving role. How would you speak to, let’s start with the spouses. How would you speak to those spouses who now may be worried that they’re going to run out of money? They may be concerned because they didn’t plan ahead for some of these costs that they may be incurring. Because before you and I started this conversation, we were talking about the fact that no one person can be a 24-hour caregiver by themselves. We need people around us, whether that be paid caregivers or family caregivers or long-term care placement, whatever the situation might be. So let’s start and talk to those spouses who may be already in this journey. What can they do right now to perhaps set themselves up for success if they’re concerned?
[8:32] Is it already too late? No, I think that is the overall consensus that we get in this fear mode and it creates anxiety because we’re like.
[8:41] Oh, I should have done more.
[8:42] And then we say, I don’t have enough. And we’re making assumptions and we objectively don’t know if that’s the case or not. What I would recommend for those spouses, you’ve got a lot on your plate. And then I’ll share a little bit of my story about where I fit in and where this has made me a more empathetic advisor. But for the spouses, there’s this tie to you that says, hey, I don’t want to let my other spouse down. I want to be there for better or worse. But you will get to a point where you can no longer, number one, provide the care that that patient needs, your spouse needs. And also, here’s an interesting fact, and Lizette, you probably already know this, but think about it. When you have a sick spouse, who is usually ultimately the one to go down faster? The one that’s already in a level of care or memory care? Or the spouse that is, and I’m using quotations here, healthier. It’s the healthier one that goes down faster, right? Because they start neglecting their doctor’s appointments. They’re not sleeping well.
[9:38] So what I would recommend is you really now more so than ever to kind of get rid of some of that anxiety, meet with a financial planner, a true fiduciary planner and go to them equipped with three simple questions. Number one, how do you get paid? And again, I like a flat fee model. I like it where they just charge you for building out a plan. The second one is, what is your investment strategy? And again, they’re not going to know that until they get to understand you. But third, and I would say most importantly, who do you work for? And they should be willing to give you an engagement letter and they’re on a retainer, much like an attorney is. And what that means is no matter what the firm sign is outside of their building, they’re now working for you on your best behalf. So again, Yes, money is a tool that gets us there, and there might be some challenges in that. I’m not saying it’s going to be easy, but what the planner can ultimately do is decide, okay, where do we need to go? And if you don’t have enough assets to cover this, can we create a plan to where we can get some government assistance or other things in line? You can do certain things. It might be that we have to think outside the box, but trying to do it all on your own is going to wear both of you down. And again, I have personal experience with that myself. Oh, I love what you said. I think those are three really good takeaways.
[10:59] Number one, how do you get paid? The second question is what is your investment strategy? And then the third one is who do you work for? And that should be your family or you individually. And it would be your family. But if they can’t disclose that or they give you the runaround, that’s because they’re not willing to give you an engagement letter. An engagement letter just means we’re signing a document that means we’re building a plan together and I’m working on your family’s behalf.
[11:24] In other words, what I hear you saying is the planner then has to recommend what’s best for you as the client, as opposed to what’s best necessarily for them and their income stream related to being paid as a planner. I love that. That’s very, very, very solid advice for people. So another good takeaway is if you are a spouse of somebody living with dementia and you now are a caregiver is it is not too late to start planning and looking ahead. Because even if you’re 70 years old, we know that a person living with dementia can live for 8, 10, 20 years related to their dementia caregiving process. So we don’t want to just make an assumption that this person who you are providing care for is going to pass away quickly because.
[12:16] Yes, getting started a year before would be better, but waiting another year and then we’ve lost more time is really not an option. And I love that you bring out that even if it feels like you may or may not have enough, getting started in the process of determining that means we can put some legal strategies in place to protect your assets or help you then qualify for public assistance or Medicaid.
[12:46] So I think that’s a very solid foundation for people to consider and not to believe that it’s too late to actually get started. So now let’s talk to the
Strategies for Adult Children Caregivers
[12:56] adult children who are contending with this. You know, they may come in a couple of flavors. I’m the adult child of parents who emigrated, which means that what they had when they came to the United States is what they had. And I’ve put some strategies in place that I made the best decisions with the information I had. However, if I were to do it again, I would do it differently. I would have sat down with Justin or somebody like him to actually look at their financial situation and try to pre-plan ahead better than what we did. But in my defense, my parents were not open to conversations like that. So, you know, you have to, as the adult child, you do have some limitations if the parental units or the grandparental units are not willing to disclose that information. But, you know, that’s a separate question. Conversation if you’re trying to help your parents. But what can I, as the adult child, I’ll just use myself as an example, what can I do to prepare better for a future caregiving situation, perhaps for myself or my husband, say one of us needed care or needed.
[14:06] You know, had something occurred that we don’t continue to kick the can down the line and expect our children to then become, you know, the bank for lack of a better statement, because that is what happens. You know, either people don’t have enough money and then their children help pick up the tab or public assistance helps pick up the tab. So what kind of strategies or where could I start? Yeah. You know, we’re seeing more and more of this and we call this the sandwich generation. And regardless if you are gluten-free or not, you’re going to be in between this. And it’s the side where you’re taking care of your parents or a spouse and also even your children.
[14:44] And you think about this too. It’s not uncommon for people not to talk about money. I think that’s been our biggest hindrance. And it’s not because people did it intentionally. It’s because they didn’t know where to turn. They didn’t know the questions to ask. I think one of the biggest things for the sandwich generation to do, and you’re doing it so well through your podcast and your business, and you’re just such an inspiration is to have more conversation.
[15:10] I mean, whether it be on a public network like this, but also individually in our family and being a little bit vulnerable to say, hey, I didn’t do everything right. This is what I would have done differently and just be open to that conversation. And I’ll be 100% transparent. And I’m this way as a financial planner, even with my clients, people just assume, oh, well, planners do everything right. And if we go to them, they’re going to judge us. Absolutely not. Most planners understand that you are dealing with not just money here. And we also understand, again, money just the tool. You’re dealing with very emotional, high stress thing, grief, trauma, and being a caregiver. It is not for the weak of heart. I told you the story at the very beginning while I got into it, my mom. My mom had a personality that could light up a room. And she told me, she’s like, you know, Justin, and this has stuck with me, but she was like, it’s better to be disliked for the person that you are than to be loved for the person you’re not. So go and find something that you love doing. And I found myself here, but what I wasn’t expected for her parents, they did financial planning. They had an investment advisor. She’s been great. I love this planner, but one of the things, and I’m putting this on my grandparents, my grandparents were not open to having caregiver, Someone like you come in and help them because they thought skilled facility.
[16:31] Any type of assistance, anything, even having somebody come in the home and help them, it was off the tables. You didn’t do it. Well, a lot of their documents were not in order. Well, when my mom passed, I’m the oldest of the family. In terms of siblings, I have a younger brother. This has been put on my dad and myself of taking care of my grandparents.
[16:50] And for eight years, they’ve been dealing with medical issues. And my granddad was diagnosed with dementia two years ago. And how we noticed it, he ran his car off into a ditch.
[17:00] Little things like this. And my grandmother and grandfather was still adamant against getting help. Well, had we had the right protocols, the paperwork in order, we could have put both of them somewhere because we were no longer giving them the care that they needed. And we had the American health system kind of involved, but it was short term and temporary, no matter which way that we turn. And being in a very real moment. There was times I wanted to go and just spend time with them as their grandson, but I could no longer do that. I was the financial planner. I was the power of attorney and paying bills and doing all this stuff. So it put strain even on the emotional relationship and it wore me out to where two years ago, I was almost hospitalized because they thought I was having a heart attack. It turned out to be a panic attack, but it was because I wasn’t sleeping. I was to too much caffeine from coffee, all this stuff. And I wasn’t taking time for myself. And you hear it a million ways to the sun, but if you’re not taking care of yourself, how are you going to help other people? Who’s going to rescue the rescuer? And my grandparents had a very hard time understanding that, but because of their own cognitive decline, they didn’t understand the stress that they were putting on other people, their neighbors, us. It even got to a point where I had only taken one vacation in the last five years. And when my grandmother called me, she was calling me crying, you’ve got to get back. And I’m on the other side of the USA.
[18:23] You have to have moments of break and timeout, as I call it, to recharge your battery. And I think that gets lost in the kind of the story of all of this, that we just think, no, we’re going to do everything we can. And you are. But the best thing you can give your loved ones is making sure that you’ve got document plans or estate documents done so that when you know you can no longer give them care, you can get a rest knowing that they’re in the hands of people that can give them this care. One of the things that weighs on you so much, it’s like, I’m doing all I can and I’m burnt out, but it’s still not enough. Well, at a certain point, if we have these things in place sooner rather than later, it makes that an easier transition. So what can the demographic that is in that sandwich generation? Start your planning soon. Start having conversations with your children. And also too, and I know everybody’s a little bit different, even the hard conversations where your kids may want to say, no, mom or dad, I want to be there for you. Let them know, hey, you will be there for me as long as this plan gets executed as we wish, right? We need a guidance. We need some guidance or a therapist or a coach to come in here to show you these things. It’s okay to have home health or if we have to go to a skilled facility, that’s okay.
[19:37] You be the person that’s giving that, what I say, the rite of passage to say, this is our wish. And we want you to rest assured that you’re not letting us down because sometimes in that sandwich generation, you feel the guilt of, should I be doing more or this or that? And if you can let people know early on, hey, this is why we’re doing it because I want you to go on and live your life and do these things and be able to maximize your value. That’s the best gift that you can give them because when they come to visit, they want to be your son or daughter or spouse, not the financial advisor. And if there’s one thing that I wish we would have done differently as a family, would have been a little bit more involved on their planning side. We were on our parents, but on their side. And we just also kind of assumed that my mom was going to outlive to the point where she could be there for them. Life didn’t have it that way. So if you have a plan in place, these are some of the things that we talk about in our meeting, and we’re just having healthy conversations, you know, and again, it can be and draw up a lot of emotions and we don’t push people too far, but we ultimately want people to know, hey, it’s better to think about it now than to have to make a rash decision when your emotions are all of these. So again, sooner rather than later for that sandwich generation
The Sandwich Generation’s Role
[20:49] is one of the best things. I think you bring up something that is really one of my biggest platforms that I’m standing on, and that is being proactive, right?
[21:00] There is this assumption in the world that you cannot plan ahead for a caregiving journey, or you cannot plan ahead for a dementia caregiving journey because it is too unpredictable. You’ve seen one person with dementia, it’s all over the matter. That’s what people believe. And the reality of the matter is that it isn’t. It does follow a very predictable path. And if we sit down and have these conversations earlier on, you know, more frequently, more often, I think we can truly impact the entire world and how the world views dementia.
[21:40] And, you know, one of the biggest commonalities as we’re talking, Justin, that came up for me is this, I’m going to use the word, you did not use the word at all, the stigma of not talking about money, right? Money was a taboo thing. It’s kind of like talking about sex, right? You don’t talk about sex out in open public conversations because we just don’t want to, you know, touch that. Well, money, how much money you make, your financial situation is kind of the same way, as well as your thinking processes, because people don’t want other people to know that they’re struggling with their thinking processes. So there’s a significant taboo on the subject of financial planning, as well as dementia, right? And dementia caregiving, people do not want to talk about these things.
[22:28] Something else you brought up as we were talking before we started recording, you mentioned your grandfather who had vascular dementia. Nobody had lived that long and nobody else had ever had signs or symptoms of dementia. So it wasn’t like there was a familial history that we could anticipate these kinds of things. So I really appreciate this mindset that I want people to take from today’s
Breaking the Stigma Around Money Conversations
[22:57] conversation is that you can plan ahead. And you can plan ahead for being a caregiver, for receiving care in the future. We love to believe that we are never going to need assistance. But I will use my daughter and her husband as an example. If you guys are listening, you can’t see Justin, but Justin is about my children’s age. He’s a young adult man. My daughter and her husband got married this December will be five years ago and the Two perfectly healthy, nothing wrong with them, young adults getting married.
[23:36] Well, six weeks after they got married, her husband, Caleb, got super, super sick, and he has not been able to work ever since then, right? No expectation that my daughter was going to turn into a young adult caregiver where her husband is not able to help financially provide for them at this moment in time. We’re hopeful Caleb is getting better every month and every year, but it’s going to take him some more time before he gets to that point. So you don’t have to be 54 or 60 or 70 years old before you have something happen. And we need to start thinking that these kinds of providential occurrences can happen to any of us at any time. You know, you mentioned your own ending up, you know, with medical stuff because of the stress, the emotional stress. It wasn’t physical stress. It was the emotional stress of being a decision maker, a caregiver as a young adult yourself.
[24:40] Are you a Christian dementia caregiver struggling to cope? Does dementia caregiving really need to be this hard? Join our free monthly Ask the Dementia Coach monthly meetup and get personalized guidance and support from me, a pastor’s wife, occupational therapist, and Christian dementia coach. By blending evidence-based strategies with Christian principles, you can radically improve your caregiving experience.
[25:11] Register now for our next Ask the Dementia Coach monthly meetup today. We limit our registrations, so don’t miss out. Sign up today. And, you know, you brought, you know, just kind of listening to that back. I mean, we even mentioned, and I think several things, there are some of us living longer. Now we are seeing a little bit of a decline, but if we are living as long, we’re going to live with more health issues. But in my grandfather’s case, nobody in his family had lived that long. So you’re not going to know he’s in his nineties now. But the second thing is, you know, when you talk about the conversation around and you brought up the conversation of sex and there was a study done not too long ago where it said most parents were more comfortable talking about sex to their children than they were about money. But what I would challenge people or people just listening is to think about it like this. Whether you talk about something or whether you expose your children to a conversation around money or whatever other difficult conversation you’re having to have, they’re going to get the information somewhere. So I would rather it come from a standpoint of love rather than a standpoint of hurt or the person giving them this information that doesn’t care about them. And, you know, I mean, because that is a reality that one way or the other, they’re going to get information. And if they’re not talking to you about it, they’re getting it from somewhere else.
[26:27] So yeah, it might be hard to talk about. And, you know, but here, I think what we have to just understand being transparent, even myself as a financial planner, I get questioned all the time that sometimes in that moment, I do not know. I’ve never heard about it. It is a situation that is so rare that I have to literally just say, hey, you know what? I have never been asked that, but…
[26:49] Let me do some research. Let me ask. Let me connect with this person who may have more. And I get back with it. It’s okay not to know. It is 100% not to know. But what is not okay is just not knowing and then not talking about it. Once you have been exposed to the question, we need to do our best to find an objective answer to that question.
[27:09] And again, it’s not always easy. I was doing a talk not long ago with a therapist and they were covering just certain addictions. And this one just happened to be around alcohol and drug. And this therapist brought up a good point. And you’ve probably heard it. You probably have even used it in your practice. But the therapist just said, you know, when they sit down and they talk to somebody that’s struggling with something, it could be food, it could be alcohol, it could be drug. It doesn’t matter whatever addiction it is. The fear of not doing that one thing or the lack of doing that one thing scares them. But what we have to come to a realization is no matter if somebody that’s battling alcohol or drug decides to get sober or they continue to be an addict, it’s going to be hard, right? Getting sober is going to be hard, but you can’t continue to sustain and live a life worth living being an addict. It’s either going to run your body down or you’re just going to stay in this funk and it’s just going to take control of your life. So what you really have to ask yourself is not what’s the easiest, but what are you willing to fight for? So kind of looking out long-term and saying, okay, what’s going to give me the most blank, fill in the blank with freedom, financial independence? Is it avoiding the conversation or is it having more conversations?
[28:20] Either one of them is going to be hard. If you avoid the conversation, then the decision when you have to make it is going to be extremely hard and probably a little irrational. Not because you’re irrational, but the emotions are high, just like in my example. But if you have the conversation sooner rather than later, no, we can’t predict anything. And you can’t just always go on the family gene history, just like with your son-in-law. I see it all the time. Somebody that’s young, one of the biggest disadvantages sometimes can be your youth because you just assume, oh, that’ll happen when I get, and then it’s always over, but it doesn’t have to be. So just always try to think about planning is for the unexpected. We don’t know everything, but if we’ve got these things in order, it’s not going to make the situation easier from a grieving standpoint, But it will from a financial planning and getting people in the right order stance. So that’s what I encourage people, really. Have those conversations because no matter which side you go on, it’s always going to be tough. It’s tough to have these conversations, but it creates that financial freedom and independence and clarity of mind as you’re dealing with that grief. So as a last takeaway for people today, what would you say is the crux of the
Essential Steps for Financial Security
[29:25] stuff that they need to absolutely, without a shadow of a doubt, have in place today? Immediately first. And then if we were to do a first tier, this is you’ve got to start here. Second tier is once you’ve got this foundation, what’s the next step? So what I would say is from any basic standpoint is understanding your cash flow.
[29:49] Even if it’s a little bit negative, that’s okay. Because again, a financial planner can look at that and say, okay, hey, why are we negative? When we understand the cash flow, then that’s when we’re going to start looking at, okay, what insurances or long-term care policies could we or could we not afford, right? I mean, that’s a big one because we’ve talked a little bit about it, but you can get health or life insurance with riders for long-term care. There’s some pros to cons to that because if you’ve got a product that does two things, they probably do both mediocre, not exceptionally well. But the benefit to having a health or life insurance with a rider on it is the fact that it’s a little bit easier and more cost-effective to utilize. Long-term care policies are a little bit more expensive, but they can potentially give you some tax deductions, but they’ll probably give you a little bit better payouts if you had to go into a long-term care facility. And by understanding those things there, that’s like, okay, that’s the foundation. That’s what we need to understand. But a very close second in going into that second step, everybody needs as soon as possible a will, some level of a healthcare directive that lets people know, hey, what are my healthcare decisions? Who’s going to make these healthcare decisions? And then also understanding certain documents within the hospital system. But those are two close seconds. And when I say you’ve got one and two, I’m not even saying it’s a second step. That’s really like a one and then a one double A below that if you’re kind of building out a summary page. But if you can understand those two things, cashflow insurance.
[31:16] And then a one double A directly above that as part of that. Okay, once we’ve got some cash built up, I need to get a will and healthcare directives in place. That’s going to be your biggest goal right there, right off the bat. And so, you know, based on today’s conversation, the best time to start was yesterday. The second best time to start is today. Right, Justin? Correct. You know, there’s an old proverb that says the best time to have planted a tree would have been 100 years ago. Yep.
[31:44] But again, you didn’t. And that’s fine. We can’t look back. You’ll never get to your destination by always looking in the rear. You need to be looking out the wind. And so instead of saying, oh, my gosh, I should have done this sooner, how you change that mindset of getting out of what you should have, could have, would have done is, OK, what are you doing today to be just a little bit? For sure. So if people, you know, this this podcast goes all over the world, but we do have people local to the upstate South Carolina. If people are interested in reaching out to you, where do they find you? How would you like people to connect with you? Yeah. So they can always reach out to me on our website, which is parallelfinancial.com. And I’m one of the advisors there, Justin Chastain. I do have several different social media, including MySpace. And I’m just kidding with that. But Tom did defriend me. That is a little funny.
[32:35] I mean, he did defriend me, which I don’t know what that says about me. But again, of course, you can find me on Facebook at Justin Chastain. And then I’m on Instagram. I believe that’s what I think that’s where all the hip kids live at the financial planning professor there as well. And again, anybody can reach out to me at Justin Chastain at ParallelFinancial.com. And for people listening, all of this information should be in the show notes as well. I thoroughly enjoyed this conversation. It definitely is something that I really believe we need to be talking more and more about, even, you know, even if there’s nothing that we can do today necessarily to like you really couldn’t fix your grandparents financial plan, etc. Et cetera, you had to implement their financial plan. But for you and for yourself in the future, it puts you now in a better position to know how to help people like me set something up so that my children don’t have the same experience that, say, you had or that I’m having with my parents. This is one of my biggest things related to caregiving is, you touched on it right at the beginning.
[33:43] You know, about 30% of caregivers actually pass away before the person that they’re taking care of because of their own stress, because they’ve neglected their own health and those kinds of things that they are doing. And it’s a very difficult number to come on statistically because how do you prove a negative, right? It’s hard for them to actually know exactly how many, what the percentage of caregivers are that are actually passing away before the person that they’re providing care for. This is in general, this is not just dementia caregivers. These are caregivers in general. But in order for us to change the future, we have to start changing what we do today. And if I don’t take better care of myself, I’m going to take better care of myself like you mentioned, your own health and coffee and caffeine and all of that. If we as the caregiver do not take care of ourself, then we have inadvertently kicked the can down the line for our children to then have to pick up and become the caregiver because I passed away or whatever. And then they’re not taking care of themselves. And we have this negative cycle that’s going to continue and we have to stop it somewhere. And it may as well start with us. It may as well start with our generation, people becoming more comfortable in talking about the hard conversations.
[35:06] Not all people who live with dementia, actually about 60% of people living with dementia actually remain at home their entire journey. The reality is it does take more than one person, right? It doesn’t mean that the people providing the care are always paid caregivers because I’ve worked with people who have had nothing and they’ve kept somebody at home because they decided to and they made it work, or they had all the money in the world and could pay for 24-hour caregivers. The reality is somebody is going to be providing 24-hour care. And so we just need to start to have those conversations, particularly in light of dementia and dementia caregiving. My last little thing I wanted to say is I actually had a phone conversation with a woman and I said to her, I said, if your person lives long enough, they will need 24-hour care. And she’s like, well, nobody’s actually told me that. I’m like, they say they may. I’m like, I understand they say they may. And that may is because if they pass away before they get to 24-hour care, they didn’t need 24-hour care. But if they live long enough with dementia, any kind of dementia, if you live long enough, you will need 24-hour care. But we’re not planning for that. We’re not talking about that. There’s this may.
[36:23] They may. Well, I say, let’s plan for it. And then if we don’t get there, we’re still in a better position than we were before we started. And then we can start to leave legacy money. No, I think that’s summed up beautifully. I mean, exactly just that. And that’s ultimately what you’re doing with different insurances or cash flow or et cetera. And again, that’s just the money piece. But going ahead and having that in the vocabulary that this will be full-time caregiving. And again, if it doesn’t, it could be something that happens sooner than that.
The Importance of Planning Ahead
[36:57] You’re still in a better position than if you had not planned. Absolutely. So the biggest takeaway today, everybody listening is plan ahead, both financially and And for the fact that if you are a dementia caregiver, you will require, the person will require 24-hour care if they live long enough. Well, Justin, thank you very much for being here today. I have enjoyed this conversation.
[37:22] No, and I think you’re doing the work and spreading the light because, again, having conversations like this is the foundation to where we move forward generationally to start having these conversations. So I’ve thoroughly enjoyed it and continue to keep up the great work that you continue to do. So I really know that this was a very valuable episode for you. If you haven’t yet signed up for one of our dementia audits, where I will sit with you for 20 to 30 minutes and have a conversation and help you along your journey, then please go to the show notes and sign up for one of these free coaching sessions. I’m really looking for people who are willing to come and actually dialogue with me there is no pressure I’m just here to serve so I really do hope that you will join me for one of these episodes so I can answer your specific questions and we can help other people who are navigating dementia in a different way and you can message me on Facebook the word audit or you can message me on Instagram.
[38:26] The word audit, and that’ll send you to a place where you can register for one of these free sessions. So I really hope you take me up on that. I’m hoping to grow that part of the program. If I can get a couple of people who are willing to come on and can be extremely valuable in helping you along this dementia caregiving journey. So as I end all of my episodes, may the Lord bless you and keep you, and I will see you in our next episode.
